Stuck In A Daydream: Learning To Battle Dissociation With Presence

By: Kiyomi Payne

The ability to remain present and engaged with your reality is vital for us to live a meaningful life. Life gains meaning through the connections we have to our identity, our relationships and the world around us. What is life without being present and feeling? As someone who struggles with a dissociation disorder, I’ve experienced moments of feeling as if I’m floating through life and often feel out of touch and detached to my reality and identity. 

Dissociation is a common phenomenon experienced by many. We've all encountered instances of dissociation, such as zoning out during a lecture or daydreaming in the shower. However, due to the mounting stress and anxiety in modern life, dissociation can escalate in some individuals, evolving into a debilitating stress disorder. Symptoms of dissociation can range in consistency and intensity, depending on whether the disorder is mild or severe in a person.

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In mild cases, the most prevalent symptoms include feelings of blankness, detachment, an inability to focus, and depression. In more severe instances, these issues become prolonged and significantly impact daily functioning.

I've personally grappled with a mild type of dissociative disorder, called Depersonalization-Derealization Disorder (DPDR). There have been times when my anxiety triggered sensations of disconnection from my emotions, memories, and reality. Even worse, my connections with myself and others seemed entirely erased, as emotional bonds in relationships faded and memories became difficult to recall. I found myself losing my sense of identity and connection to life. My senses became disoriented, and life felt like a dream, present yet not fully engaged in my reality. Over the years, I've navigated in and out of this condition, mostly managing it independently. Although there were periods where I would “space out” for months, by learning more about DPDR and healthy coping mechanisms, I gradually improved. Nowadays the episodes have lessened to just a couple of weeks or only a few days.

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It's crucial to gain a deeper understanding of this condition and how it personally applies to you to effectively overcome it. The ability to identify your triggers will empower you to comprehend the boundaries necessary in your life and establish protocols for prevention. Common triggers can often encompass stress, memories, strong emotions, and sensory inputs. In my case, my triggers were typically prompted by experiences of trauma or situations inducing anxiety. Learning to employ self-help  techniques and coping mechanisms can significantly aid in managing and ultimately conquering this disorder. Here are some key insights I've acquired on my journey.

The Importance Behind Practicing Presence 

Dissociation functions as a form of avoidance, so conversely, the practice of mindfulness or being present serves as a powerful defense against dissociation. This practice trains the brain to repeatedly recognize and reconnect with our senses and the current moment, allowing us to redirect our focus from being consumed or evading the present situation. Therefore by developing a routine of practicing mindfulness it will help those suffering with dissociation create a habit of being focused and engaged with the present moment. 

Dissociation emerges as a stress-triggered disorder. The weight of anxiety overwhelms both our bodies and minds, causing our thoughts to become unfocused and disconnected. I've personally discovered that adopting consistent stress-relief practices has aided me in emerging from states of dissociation.

Coping Methods To Help You Manage and Overcome A Dissociative Disorder

When you find yourself in a dissociative state, these grounding techniques can serve as reliable reference points. Experiment with various methods until you identify the ones that resonate best with you. Consistently practicing these techniques will aid your brain in re-establishing its capacity to be fully present and engaged. Over time, this progression can empower you to manage the disorder effectively and hopefully eventually overcome it.

Meditation

Among meditation practices, three types stand out for their effectiveness: Walking meditations, Mantra Meditations, and Visual meditations. Exploring these meditation variations can enhance your ability to concentrate. I've personally found that meditation not only enhances mental clarity but also instills a sense of ease within me.

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Breathwork Exercises

Breathwork stands as an incredible practice with benefits ranging from focus and energy enhancement to anxiety reduction. Engaging in breathwork exercises that foster clarity and vitality can amplify mindfulness and equilibrium within your mind. This guided breathwork exercise video by David Palmen is one of my favorites. 

Sensory Items, Fidget Toys, Stress Relievers, Essential Oils

In situations where I struggled with dissociation, I discovered the value of comforting myself through sensory items like stress-relieving toys. If such items weren't available, I would focus on the sensation of touch by gently rubbing the back of my hand. Utilizing these tools can effectively manage the anxiety that accompanies episodes, bringing about a soothing effect for both mind and body.

Connect With Your Body

Partaking in gentle exercises like yoga, tai chi, or dancing can heighten bodily awareness and pull your mind out of a dissociative state by intensifying focus.

Photo by Aziz Acharki on Unsplash

Sound Therapy

Music therapies such as subliminals, meditation music, or binaural beats wield a range of benefits. They enhance focus, clarity, and even aid in reconnecting with emotions. The Mind Spa App offers an array of sound journeys that foster increased clarity, focus, and mindfulness.

Journaling

Journaling stands as a powerful tool for reconnecting with and recapturing the emotions you've become detached from. When you sit down to journal, you create a space for reflection and emotional reconnection. You can try out using these journal prompts for disassociation. 

The Journey To Recovery

Photo by Junior REIS via unsplash.

The effectiveness of these grounding practices can vary, based on the severity of the disorder. In instances of intense disorder, these grounding methods may not suffice as the sole solution. Therefore, it is advisable to consider psychotherapy and consult your doctor regarding anxiety medication to enhance your quality of life.

In my personal journey, the impact of DPDR has significantly diminished. I've prioritized my well-being by focusing on health maintenance and adopting strategies to prevent stress accumulation in my body, all while being vigilant about managing my anxiety levels. These coping mechanisms helped me to manage and bring back the awareness I’d lost. These measures have proven immensely beneficial in reducing the frequency of episodes.  By implementing these coping mechanisms and becoming ever more present, you can recover and regain the stability that this disorder took from you returning to being fully engaged with life. 

Kiyomi is the chief editor behind the lifestyle blog, KiwiKissed.com where she shares wellness, beauty, travel and entertainment content. She loves connecting with her readers and sharing advice that will help enrich their life. Connect with her on socials for more lifestyle content and to keep updated with her recent articles!

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